- The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
- One may not commit any “unnatural acts” with another person.
- Unmarried couples may not commit “lewd acts” and live together in the same residence.
- Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.
- Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
- It is illegal to sell your children.
- Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
- A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
- If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
- It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
- Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
- Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
- It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
- When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
- You may not fart in a public place after 6 PM.
- It is considered an offense to shower naked.
- You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
- Oral sex is illegal.
- You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.
- Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
Canada hat aber auch noch einen Kracher:
- If you are released from prison, it is required that you are given a handgun with bullets and a horse, so you can ride out of town.
Und noch einer aus South Carolina für uns Michelinfahrer:
- When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
